Saturday, January 31, 2009

Big Plans

Another great day for basketball. My boys played a great game of elbowing each other. I thought they were going to be pulled off the court for it. They still won....again. The season is almost over just 3 more games. I am devastated, but can't wait for baseball. My charming and energetic husband is going to coach this year so it should be quite interesting.

Today I was wondering what we are going to do for spring break. Maybe another cruise or a trip to the beach. Wouldn't that be nice. We will have to see.

I am still very busy getting my business off the ground. I have been working and searching everyday for different things that will help me. We have a name which I hesitate to advertise on a blog but I think it is going to be "Creative Canvas Concepts or Creative Canvas Photography" I don't know which one. I think we will have to stick with photography so people will know what it is. We are so silly we are already talking about franchising it. I have some great items that I am going to be selling with it and I have been scoping out places to take the pictures. I can't believe it my own little business. How Exciting!

Well I am going to retire to bed now. I have to be up at 7:00 to drop off breakfast a church for the football players. The church is having a breakfast in honor of the Super Bowl.

Go Cardinals...

Friday, January 30, 2009

Mario and I have decided to start a photography business. I have been working 4 days on my business plan. You can't have a business without a plan. It is just another on of those dreams that I thought could never happen. So, I am on my way to big dreams and new futures.

I can't wait. I have already found the camera I am going to use, I just have to decide which lenses I need to buy first. I know that I have to at least get one wide angel and one telephoto but there are so many. Research has been my number one priority these past few days.

Anyway at least I have a plan coming together. I can't wait to put together my portfolio.

Monday, January 26, 2009

I hate the cold and today it is so cold. We are supposed to have an ice-storm tonight. I am not looking forward to this, that means another day stuck in the house.

Today was a good day, Daegon had gymnastics and he is so good at it. There might be a future in it for him. He loves going and gets upset when he can't go. Oh to have a Gymnast in the family.

Friday, January 23, 2009

First date pics

Here are the pictures from Daxton's first date. They watched Hotel 4 Dogs. It was so cute.

First date.

Another BEAutiful day! If it stays this nice outside I think I might be able to crawl out of this depression. I hate being couped up inside the house all day and I know that Daegon hates it.

Guess what folks, Daxton's is going on his first date tonight. I know that I am not supposed to talk about it, but it is going to be so cute. I just wish he would let me take pictures. Maybe I can sneak one in. They are going to the movies in Milan. It is a small town movie theater so there is no way that Mario and I could sneak in to make sure they keep things G rated. Daxton is going on a double date so I don't think that anything will happen but you never know. Mario and I are going to be in the theater so maybe we can sneak Dawson in to watch them, but knowing him he would fall asleep on the job.

P.S. If anyone is looking for a good deal Abercrombie is having a huge sale that they are not advertising. I got Daxton a couple of zip up hoodies and me a sweater for like $80.00. That is dirt cheep considering the jackets regularly cost $100.00 and $80.00. The great part about this is I can fit into Daxton clothes so we can share. I love him. He lets his mom wear his clothes. HeeHee

Spend the day outside.

Thursday, January 22, 2009

Bubbly, Bubbly, Day!

Today was another great day. We went out to eat again with my hubby, this time it was Daegon and Dawson that attended. Dawson had to stay home because he was sick yesterday and everyone knows that once you throw-up you have to stay out of school for 24 hours. So we came back home and as it turns out it was warm outside. So, I cleaned the pool out while the boys played in the yard, then I went over and talked to my nice neighbor. She is such a nice person. She told me about this scrapbooking party that one of her friends has like once a month so we are going to go next month. I can't wait....I love to scrapbooking....I just need to be inspired and sitting at home trying to do it by myself isn't very inspiring. She also told me about a few ladies in the neighborhood that have or is trying to start up a photography business. I might have to go talk to them about how they are doing and see how hard it would be. I really want to do this but I have to make sure it will make at least some money. Maybe I will take a class or two. I should ask one of my friends how they started their little business.

If anyone has an advice let me know. I promise not to make you look bad when I do better than you.

I don't think he felt very well.
Sleeping in the car on the way home from lunch.

A few cute pictures.

I just wanted to post these pictures I thought they were cute. We were at my older two's basketball game. Those pictures did not turn out very well. I am going to try and get good ones this weekend of them. But for now here is my hubby and baby.

Wednesday, January 21, 2009

A better day. But still questioning.

Every time I get on here I think how do I start? Well today has been an exceptional day. Daegon and I went to eat with my hubby and then we came home. I am trying to clean the house although that is very difficult because we are putting up chair railing in the dinning room and it is taking over other areas in the house. Such a small task and so messy. I think that after it is done it is going to look great. I got a call from the school today and they told me that Dawson was throwing up so here I go mom to the rescue. I get there and he is hurting and pail, he does not look good. So I send him to bed with crackers. I hope he feels better, no school for him tomorrow.
Now get ready because this subject lays heavy on my heart. How do people leave their kids? Our preacher was talking about abortion and if you know me then you know that I am total against abortion. To me it is murder no matter how you look at it. With that being said in my situation it always leads me to questions about how mothers leave their children? I didn't get the pleasure of birthing my older two and even though I met them when they were 5 and 2 1/2 I think of them as my adopted children. An adopted mother loves her kids just as much as her own. Not many people understand that but it is true after raising them, helping them everyday after school, teaching Dawson how to read and write, being at their school everyday, taking care of them when they are sick, punishing them when they are bad and rewarding them when they are good, watching them go on their first date, playing board games with them (we love that), and just everyday things. I don't know if I could miss those moments in my kids lives. I think that Lord everyday that I have with them. I think of Daegon and I don't even want him to go to my parents for a visit. A day apart from him is like a knife in my heart. I think about him every moment of the day. I know that my kids will always be with me until the day that we die. I might even have to follow them to college....Just kidding...Not. So than what do you tell them when they ask you "why does my "biological" mother not love me?". My answer used to be "she does" but the fact of the matter is I can't keep covering for her. Now I say "ask her". My 9 year old can't remember living with her so he doesn't even know who she is. She needs to tell them why she doesn't want to live close to them.
Another question I have is do people live in their own little world or do they really not think that people see what they really are? I mean come on. If you are a fairly intelligent person and you have spent time with someone you should be able to see if they are fake or not. Especially when they talk to other people. I hate liars and when I hear someone lying I just want to stand up and tell everyone the truth. I used to do that, but now I am a little more sensible. I just sit back and wait till the right moment to bring it up. I know that I am not perfect and that I have flaws which, I am trying to make since out of. But rarely do I lie and it is never about anything important. So how do we stop these liars and when is it time to say we have had enough?
If anyone is going through the same thing that I am please don't hesitate to let me know. I would enjoy getting another person's perspective on these subjects.
I am also trying to figure out how to us my web cam. It is cool.

Tuesday, January 20, 2009

First day of our nine week bible study.

This was the first day of our nine weeks of bible study, we are doing Beth Moore's Esther "It's hard being woman". I think that this will be a great bible study. Beth Moore said something that really hit me hard. She said that most of our problems as women come from other women. That is so true...I was think about all the women in my life that I either have to compete with or that cause me problems and judge me before they know the truth.

On a lighter note after bible study Daegon and I went to see my hubby for lunch. On the way home Daegon was playing with my sunglasses and he put them on upside down. It was so cute

looking that I had to take a picture.

Sunday, January 18, 2009

Open Eyes.

This past weekend my eyes were opened (wide). I think God is testing me to see how strong of a mother I really am and how I handle difficult situations with my kids. There we a few things that went on this past weekend. I think that as parents my husband and I handled it very well and the kids learned their lessons.

On a better note my husband and I have been on that weight watchers diet for three weeks going on four and I have lost 6 lbs and he has lost 11 lbs. We also feel better on a day to day basis. It is still really hard to keep the temptations of junk food under control especially at night time. But we are compensating for that with the weight watchers snacks. They are really good and are helping. I hope to see more improvements in the weeks to come and make this a life style not a crash diet.

Saturday, January 17, 2009

Another day as a mom....How SUPER can I be.

Today was just another day in the life as a parent of a teenager. My 12 Year old is still having problems telling the truth. We have been over this and over this. He has even tried to involve his 9 year old brother. So now they are both in trouble. Why to do...Do you ground them for eternity? Or do you try talking to them until you are beating your head against a wall? Well I have tried both and now we have turned to God for his help, but we are still not getting through. Maybe it is just one of those things that you have to go through. I know that he is going through a lot...not just in his school life but with his biological mom. He is feeling hurt by her and questioning whether she loves him or not. I wish I could make all that go away so that he doesn't have to deal with any extra stress. I only hope that it doesn't drive him to anything crazy like suicide. He doesn't show signs of that but you never know. You have to know what all he has been through since he was 5 to understand what he is going through. I have told him that I do not know how he feels, but I will always be there for him and that he will never have to question my love and devotion to him. So how do you get through to a child that still lies. Well maybe he needs a hobbies. My parents bought him a guitar for Christmas but he has not been allowed to play it because of his lying and grades. That could be the answer.

Lets all just pray that we make it through the teen years.

Thursday, January 15, 2009

Frustrating Basketball

I just got back from watching my kids basketball practice and I am tired of going through the same old stuff every year. People telling me that Dax is a ball hog and Dawson is to aggressive. Telling them that they need to slow down and pass the ball. It is not their fault that everyone else sucks. You know why don't they tell the kids who suck that they suck. OOOHHH because that wouldn't be nice. We all have to be nice to the ones who don't succeed and all the others must stoop to their level. Well I think that my kids should be the best that they can be. No one should be telling my child that he should not give it all that he has....I mean come on.
Well I feel better.

Go Kids Go. You are going to be the greatest.

Tuesday, January 13, 2009

Faith and Creativity.

I have been painting the inside of my house for over a week now and it is bring me back to who I used to be. I know that sounds weird but, I used to love drawing, painting, scrapbooking, taking pictures, and developing pictures. I used to sit for hours sketching and paint. I took a few photography classes where we made cameras and developed our own pictures. I miss all of that. I am tooling around my house with a bachelor's degree and a teaching certificate but I still feel like I have a different calling in life. A calling that says something about who I am (or who I used to be).

I wish I was in a position to do some or at least one of the things that I loved to do. I guess I will have to save that for old age. It is true the youth is wasted on the young.

I think that these feelings are coming about because I have been trying to find God again. He has always been there for me but I have been failing Him in worship. This has come about because of my oldest son. He spends the summers away from me and while he was gone he was baptised. I have tried to make sense out of this for the past few months but have not been able to. Why would someone encourage them to do somthing when clearly they were not ready.

Since we moved from Little Rock we have not been attending a church on a regular basis. Well my two oldest kids go away for the summer and I am guessing that they do attend church. Well anyway my point is that they have not been going and while they were away they were baptised this would have been a great thing had it been explained to them in a proper manner and not something that was done spur of the moment. This was a decision they should have made but only after understanding what a true saved christian is. My kids have told me that they thought that it was OK to lie because they were saved and that they were going to heaven no matter what. I was very saddened by this news. I explained to them that even though you are saved you still have to try your best not to do things that are wrong. I also explained that being baptised is just a symbol letting everyone know that you have been saved. Dunking your head under water does not mean that you are going to heaven. I myself have not been saved. I think that I am on the right path and soon I will be ready but I can not be saved until I am willing to give myself to Christ and except Jesus in my heart forever. I don't want to rush into this I want it to be real and forever but I need my kids to understand and they can not until I do. I realized that my 9 year old does not know what being saved is because I went up to the front of the church and knelt down to pray to God to help me and my family and my 9 year old came up to me and said "Hi mom what are doing?" I asked him "what do you think I am doing up here?" He said "I don't know". I explained what I was doing and he was like "OK". That is how I know that he does not understand why his head was put under water. What a shame. I hope we will all find Christ together.

My prayers.

What my point to all of this is....I think that God is trying to lead me down a path I can't quit figure out what it is but I hope I listen.

Monday, January 12, 2009

My Birthday.

Yesterday was my 28th Birthday. I don't feel any older but I know that I am supposed to act older. I still feel like I am 21 years old...I think I am stuck on that number because it was that year that I started dating my husband. I look at my kids and know that I am getting old. When your baby boy turns 12 and announce to you that he has a girlfriend and that he wants to take her on a date then you know that you are getting old.

A DATE are you kidding me...He is 12...What could he possibly do on a date? He wants to go to the movies...HMMM...A dark theater. I don't know about that. How about Dinner with mom and dad? I just don't think he would go for that. I do have to say that this girl is cute and can she play basketball. I will add pics as soon as they are sent to me.

Anyway so for my Birthday my parents bought me a cake and took me out to eat. After they left my husband took me shopping. He does this every year. There are only two days a year that I get to go shopping and go where ever I want is on my Birthday and Mothers day. I try to take full advantage of these two days except this year we live in Tennessee and the mall here is very sad. I could have gone to Memphis but it is like an hour away and it was Sunday....Maybe next year. I bought a couple of shirts from Abercrombi and I was going to buy this purse, I think the pattern looks like a giraffe. I really think that it is cute, I will have to go back and get it some other time.

Well that was my Birthday!

Saturday, January 10, 2009

My Parents Visit and first basketball game.

My parents came down to visit me this weekend. It was so cute when they showed up my baby got all excited and said "PaPa PaPa" and ran too him. This was the first time that my baby was excited to see them. Most of our visits with my parents are spread out to much that it takes him a while to get to know them. But we have been visiting them a lot lately so Daegon has got to know them.

My two older kids had their first basketball game of the year. This year is special because they are playing on the same team. They are 2 years apart and since we are in a small town they have to put 4th-6th grade on the same team to make teams to play against. I am really excited this year because my 12 year old is great at scoring baskets and my 9 year old is great at getting them ball and tackling people. So both of them together on the same team will make a great offense and defensive team. Well we went to the game and by the end Daxton was out of breath but had scored 75% of the points. The score at the end was 46-33. It is going to be a great season.

Daxton is number 34. I will have better pictures soon.

Friday, January 9, 2009

Bible Study

I went to my bible study last night. Again I had so much fun. It is nice to get together with the girls and talk about God's message. I love listening to the other girls testimonies. Most of the time it hits so close to home for me that I go home and ponder for days about what was said and how I can improve me life and family.

God Bless and Enjoy!

Thursday, January 8, 2009

Let me finish my how my life was changed story. My husband and I got out of the air force and he got a job working for ABF Freight Systems. Which took us to Tulsa OK and during our stay there I finished my degree in Organizational Management and had my baby boy named Daegon. That makes 3 boys for me. 3 days after having him my mom drove me to Dallas Texas where we bought our first house. It was on a pennisula surrounded by other very large houses. It was home and we loved it. Now we are living in Milan Tennessee and having a hard time living in a small slow town. We put a pool in the back yard to occupy our time in the summer. We own an acre of land and a pretty good size house but with all 5 of us it feels smaller.

There you have it this is my life and I love it.

God Bless and Enjoy!

The start of my life.

I have blogged before but never like this. I will have to start from the beginning so readers understand my situation. I will start with my journey to Little Rock, AR where I met my soul mate. People say that but in my case it is true. I joined the military on June 4, 2000 I didn't know how this decision would effect my life in the most positive ways. I was working in a warehouse pulling aircraft parts and sending them to the flight line where maintenance fixed the planes. Well one night I think in Oct 2001 I was talking to this girl named Kelly she said "you have to see this guy at red" (that is where the parts go to fix the planes) "he is so hot". Well his name was Mario and we had been talking on the phone for quite some time just work stuff and one of the guys that works with him came up to the warehouse to pick-up a tire and when he went back to the squadron he told Mario "you have to see this girl in the warehouse". Well curiosity got the best of him so he came to the warehouse a few days later to pick-up a part. As soon as I saw him I almost fainted. He is so hot I thought. He is tall, blond, blue eyed, and OMG'sh HOT. So, he became known as the "HOTTI AT RED" We flirted on the phone and I really didn't think much of him at this point, because I was so busy with my life and all the while he was trying his hardest to keep me on the phone talking. It didn't really hit me until I changed jobs and started delivering parts to him. I scoped out his desk to see if he was married nope no ring, no pictures, I knew that he was free. I did happen to see that he had kids no big deal I can handle. So the week of my 21st birthday party in January 2002 I asked him to join me and my friends. There you have it we are now a couple.

Well then I had to meet the kids. Daxton just turned 5 and Dawson was 2 1/2 years old. They we so cute, but the first time I met them I was mistaken for their mom. Daxton woke up and asked "mommy how long are you staying". I was in shock, I walked out of the room and stood in the hall asking.....What do I do? ...what do I say?... Do I leave? Mario came, got me, and we had a proper introduction. From then on we were all together all the time. I had never really wanted kids but that changed quickly.

To make a long story short we had a lot of ups and downs with their mom and we try to make it work everyday. But when it comes right down to it. I love Daxton and Dawson and I have been with them for 6 years now I have from day one treated them like they were mine and will continue to treat them like that. I love my boys and they love me.

Well I am going to leave it at that for now. I have to get back to my motherly duties.
With all of my love.

God bless and enjoy.

My 21st Birthday party. The first time we spent
time together outside work. January 2002

Us at the Arch in St. Louis July 2002